Friday, November 16, 2007

Branch I: Total Lack of Nuclear Devastation

Well, everyone wants to join the Evil Power Master. Not like we have a whole lotta choice here.


What then, Commander? I'll tell you what: We'll transport you into a glass bubble, where you'll find out I'm 3 people with confused expressions, and you will get to stay in the bubble, where we will take over the universe, and play Canasta, for all eternity.

Ending P:
Type: Failure/What-The-Hell

Hmm. That's not so good. I'm terrible at Canasta, I don't even know the rules or correct spelling. Let's defy him.




This surprises no one. And he's right, we're idiots.

Ending Q:
Type: Failure/Death

As much as we wanted to split up with Flppto, that never actually happened. His idea was terrible. Photoshop Flppto getting mauled by bears. Let's override his stupidity and do things our way.




Whoa whoa whoa, whoa... hold up. You mean to tell me the Rapid Force has nuclear devastators and you're leaving them behind? We deserve nothing but failure for this. I mean, we're not even gonna be on our own planet. Why Shouldn't we nuclear devastate the Evil Power Master?


Oh joy... a Death Star. Maybe we could Nuclear Devastate that? Maybe we could turn around, go get the devastators, and then devastate. I'm still angry about leaving those. And these losers want to mill around or land? Forget that. Space is a lawless frontier with inexplicable phenomenon and uncertain motives, where the only true answer to any given problem is Nuclear Devastation. This is a load of poo.

We have two utterly lame choices: Branch R will have us land on the Death Star. Branch S will have us meander around looking at stuff. Neither will initiate nuclear devastation or get Flppto and the droid murdered. This bites.


Ending Catalogue:
Total Endings: 18
Non-Endings: BB BE BF BG
Victory Endings: Z AC AR AT
Failure Endings: P Q AA AB AN AP AS BA BC BD BF BG
Death Endings: Q AA AB AP AS BA BC BD

What-The-Hell Endings: P AA AN BA BE BG

3 comments:

Ryan Francis said...

Let's land on the Deathstar.

Anonymous said...

Huh...Flppto's Plan really does suck...

Land that sucker. It's what Flppto wouldn't want you to do.

Anonymous said...

You've spelled Canasta right, surprisingly.

Anyway, I pick Branch R, where although we will most certainly die, it will at least be in an interesting fashion, and Flppto will probably die first trying to save us or something.

Or maybe if we're lucky we might actually surprise the EPM or something. Or we could have SCARY PICTURE. Who knows?