Sunday, November 11, 2007

Branch X: More Lying to Marine Biologists

Because this is clearly Knight Boat, we will be unstoppable if we use it to escape, until we get to land (when we will use a canal, fjord, or inlet to progress).


We escape from the Marine Biology Stronghold of Evil only to create a protracted siege situation later. The Evil Power Master escapes, and the Commander is an idiot. The book ends, nothing resolved.

Ending BB:
Type: Non-Ending

That blows. Let's hide under the dock instead.
We're captured. Everyone gives up because it turns out we were the only person with a spine in the entire star system (lotta invertebrate species here) and they have no will of their own. The Evil Power Master wins. We do not win because we are a skeleton. Skeletons are never winners.

We need a series of Public Service Announcement posters with pictures of skeletons with captions or people pointing at them announcing "You're no Winner!".

Ending BC:
Type: Failure/Death

Clearly sitting at the table while Marc goes and commits nefarious deeds of Marine Biology was a mistake. Smalltalk over coffee only leads to failure and death. Let's try to follow Mark, belatedly.
Clearly we forgot about the terror of the Marine Biology gang initiation rites. Strange things can happen at a Fish Institute, like fish swimming around. Doesn't get stranger than that. Maybe they're growing Metroid. Maybe they're trying to breed the Evil Power Master a Metroid large enough for him to wear as a hat.

Decision Time! Let's follow Marc (AN) or let's cry and weep and call Flppto for help because he's clearly more competent than we are (AO).

Ending Catalogue:
Total Endings: 10
Non-Endings: BB BE
Victory Endings: Z AC AR AT
Failure Endings: AA AB AP AS BC BD
Death Endings: AA AB AP AS BC BD

What-The-Hell Endings: AA BE

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Lets go with AN. Flptto (or however you spell it>.>) is useless.

Anonymous said...

Let's cry and weep for Flppto to help us. Remember that time he saved us, and then rocks fell and everyone died? Maybe we can get that again, only with SURPRISE FISH.

Anonymous said...

Well, on the one hand I hate Flippto. On the other hand, I have a strong feeling the other path will lead to idiocy.

Jigglysaint said...

I demand to see a picture of the Evil Power Master with a Metroid as a hat.

Also, am I the only one who's reading this? I'd pay for the blasted membership if I had credit card handy.

Ryan Francis said...

Screw Flppto. Follow Marc.

Anonymous said...

I dunno how useful a Metroid hat would be...I mean they suck out all life, so unless the Evil Power Master is a being of pure un-life, he'd be screwed.

Ahh well...call Flppto, maybe he'll die spectacularly and let us escape.

Anonymous said...

Call the Martian. He wants you to call him! He's psychic sometimes xD